What are your epic fails?

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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Kevin.S Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 Jun 2022 at 9:10am
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Titanium
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Fortunately I don't have any really epic ones, but when I popped out for a solo fish one day I  put the boat in the water, tied it to the pontoons and went and parked the car and trailer.  Got in the boat, started it up and reversed out.  Barely got past the end of the pontoons when the engine stopped and could not restart it.  Luckily I hadn't gone far so was able to paddle the boat back to the ramp with the emergency oar I keep in the boat.  Got the boat out onto the trailer and was just going to fit the clamps on the back to lock it onto the trailer when I noticed that the petrol pipe had come off the engine.  Reconnected the pipe, boat back in the water and everything was fine.

I'll also always remember the day I had to cut all my bait with a pair of braid scissors I found in my tackle bag after leaving the bait knife at home.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote bazza Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 Jun 2022 at 9:34pm
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Originally posted by kitno kitno wrote:

Where's Bazza

Sorry to keep you waiting but have only just returned from a 3 day fly fishing expedition on the Whirinaki
with the river unfishable after a couple of weeks rain despite not having shown on the weather map.

Nevertheless so as not to waste the time (and fuel) invested decided would devote it to research namely :-

(1) The low temperature limit of a human body trying to sleep overnight riverside in a Mitsi Outlander      during a mid winter heavy frost.

(2) Taking yet another dunk in the aforementioned river to further prove the water resistance of my no expense spared $9 Kmart watch.

(3) Misplacing my wallet ... to test how ingenious the human brain can be to counter the handicap of not having any cash or the multitude of various credit cards & suchlike to purchase fuel etc. needed for the trip home not to mention sustainance in the form of food or for that matter drink to calm the feeling of complete distress ... however this experiment had to be abandoned when the wallet was discovered in the most unlikely of places.

There are endless other examples of misadventure but will need to select a couple restricted to only one or two chapters .... watch this space.
  

 
If your nose runs and your feet smell then you are built back to front ... but quite welcome on the forum nevertheless !
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote kimber7wsm Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 6:18am
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When I was living in Wanaka, my uncle used to leave a 14foot boat at my place to save towing it up from Dunno's. It was a cheap deal he picked up from some where and it had the most unreliable motor. So after taking it back to Dunno's to get his mate to fix it for the fourth or fifth time, he came back pronounced it good to go. So we set off to the coast for a hunt and fish. We settled on a fish across lake Paringa where he would drop me off for a hunt, while he carried on fishing.

He had a spare motor it the back of the wagon and I said we should take it, he said naa no need my mate has fixed it. So we set off. As we got to the far end, we realized that someone had beaten us to the hunting drop off point. Just then the motor spluttered and died, not to be started again.

That lead to a long paddle back with a cut down oar only about 600mm long and a broom handle with a bit of plywood screwed to it for motivation power.

All I could see the whole paddle back, was the vehicle with a spare motor in the back of it taunting us!!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote waynorth Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 10:22am
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Headed out for a fish with a local mate who worked for DOC. He agreed to bring some of his home made burley, but after anchoring we discovered he had grabbed the wrong bag out of the freezer, and had brought out a frozen kiwi. 
treat fish like fish
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Schampy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 11:47am
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Hooked a large kingfish off a wooden boat ramp at Stanly bay years ago. Lost my footing and got pulled into the water- The screams of laughter from my son and best mate that were there watching still haunt me to this day.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Alan L Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 11:48am
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Originally posted by waynorth waynorth wrote:

Headed out for a fish with a local mate who worked for DOC. He agreed to bring some of his home made burley, but after anchoring we discovered he had grabbed the wrong bag out of the freezer, and had brought out a frozen kiwi. 

Was it any good... for bait?
Alan
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote bazza Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 12:58pm
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Originally posted by kitno kitno wrote:

Where's Bazza

Sorry to keep you waiting but have only just returned from a 3 day fly fishing expedition on the Whirinaki
with the river unfishable after a couple of weeks rain despite not having shown on the weather map.

Nevertheless so as not to waste the time (and fuel) invested decided would devote it to research namely :-

(1) The low temperature limit of a human body trying to sleep overnight riverside in a Mitsi Outlander      during a mid winter heavy frost.

(2) Taking yet another dunk in the aforementioned river to further prove the water resistance of my no expense spared $9 Kmart watch.

(3) Misplacing my wallet ... to test how ingenious the human brain can be to counter the handicap of having any cash or the multitude of various credit cards & suchlike to purchase fuel etc. needed for the trip home not to mention sustainance in the form of food or for that matter drink to calm the feeling of complete distress ... however this experiment had to be abandoned when the wallet was discovered in the most unlikely of places.

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Apologies re repeat post but site would not allow me to edit or reply to the original so have had to resort to copy & pasting to retain any sense of sequence.
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Continued from original post.

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As invariably happens when you blank it seems everyone asks "Did you catch anything ?" & this occasion was no exception so would simply answer "have a couple of prime 4 lb rainbows to take home. This was not an untruth so long as was careful not to add was given them by a benevolent local from their freeezer that presumably felt sorry for me having to contend with such hostile river conditions now I am back home  .... a strategy I might add that continues to work so long as it remains my little secret.  
If your nose runs and your feet smell then you are built back to front ... but quite welcome on the forum nevertheless !
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Kandrew Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 1:04pm
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Had an epic fail today, up early to head out on the firth for a jig. Back the tractor out of the shed, contect the trailer on. Jump on the tractor and nothing at the starter, so had to crank start it.

Wind side onto the tide so couldn’t get a good drift happening and only caught goldfish.

Back to the beach at low tide, pushed the tinnie up onto the sand but by the time I got the tractor started which I had to hand crank again. The boat was being blown away in the wind.

Walked out to get it and got stuck in the mud up to my knees and when I pulled my feet out of the mud, my shimano fishing shoes stayed in the mud and I lost them.

What a day, time to fix the tractor.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote smudge Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 7:51pm
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This thread just keeps getting better! Good to know some of us do make mistakes sometimes Wink

I better post up some of my better fails soon, including my promised ciggie story Big smile
Best gurnard fisherman in my street
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Big -Dave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 8:00pm
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Tractors...
My son just rang me, my tractor has broken down..might be the fuel bug..and I'm not up there for once.

My recent dopey moment was at easter..hooked the boat up to the patrol, I can take the keys out of the ignition without turning it off, unlocked the boat, hooked it up and off I went.
Nearly 3 hours later, stop at the beach, go to turn the engine off, and um... no keys...
I think and I realise in had left them on the spare tyre with the lock..
Rang my son, he went down the road and couldn't find them..
Then I had a brain wave, and yes!,!, I had the spare keys in my bag...
Found the keys and lock 4 days later, keys buggered, lock usable. .300 m down the road..
you can't fix an idiot with duct tape, but it does muffle them for a while...
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote Kandrew Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 8:09pm
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Just one of those hell days, but still better than sitting in the office.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote Alan L Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 8:34pm
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I knew Bazza wouldn't let us down. And that was just back from his last trip.
Alan
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote The Tamure Kid Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Jun 2022 at 9:30pm
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Originally posted by Kevin.S Kevin.S wrote:

Barely got past the end of the pontoons when the engine stopped and could not restart it.  Luckily I hadn't gone far so was able to paddle the boat back to the ramp with the emergency oar I keep in the boat.  Got the boat out onto the trailer and was just going to fit the clamps on the back to lock it onto the trailer when I noticed that the petrol pipe had come off the engine.  Reconnected the pipe, boat back in the water and everything was fine.

Ditto, mate. Heading out of Rangaunu Harbour, from Rangiputa, solo on a late autumn week day with no-one else around. Started first time, as usual. But went 100m and cut out, re-start for a moment, cut-out. Over and over.
I was crapping myself as I drifted  out to sea fast on the outgoing tide. So thinking quickly, i chucked the anchor over to stop me going any further from shore and tried to calmly assess what it sounded like - fuel! Found the loose join on the tote, reconnected and all was rosey. Got two stonker snapper that day, too.

Other memorable ones:

- drove from Hamilton to Lake Aniwhenua, walked along the shoreline - ready to start fishing - no fly box... Luckily the local lodge owner sold flies, so it wasn't a complete fail.

- a good mate took me out on his oldish Buccaneer from Westhaven right out to the Noises. Not a bite, so time to move. Engine won't go. "Damn, it's been playing up a bit", he says. No go after numerous attempts. "Luckily we've got the auxiliary."  He pull starts that, only for it to cut out after 30 seconds. "It tends to do that". He refused to call Coastguard, so we made potentially the slowest journey ever back from the Noises to Westhaven with the auxiliary cutting out after each short burst. Luckily it was an incoming tide, so after we eventually made it to the Rangitoto Channel, we stopped and drift fished for a bit; before doing his sputtering auxiliary thing around North Head and the rest of the way. We weren't really talking by the end of the trip...

- Another fly fishing one - a 10th 'last cast' as light faded on the Hydro Pool, Tongariro. Casting heavy nymphs in a vicious sou-wester. Donk. Weird light feel on the rod. Hmmm, the top 10" of my favourite rod floated off down the line - the victim of a 'bomb' nymph whacking it on the forward cast. Ouch

- Fishing with my dad in our old Parkercraft dinghy at the mussel farm north of Kaiaua. Got a bump on a livie down near the bottom, not the kingie I'd hoped for but a huge John Dory. My first ever. Just as my dad yelled "use the net" I tried to lift it into the boat on the trace - only for the jack mackerel in its throat to come free. Silence in the boat. I had no idea that sometimes they don't get hooked, they just have the livie snagged in their throat. The fail turned into an epic a little while later when we decided to call it quits and we discovered I'd dropped the anchor too close to the long end of a mussel rope, despite dad's misgivings, and we had to cut our line to get free. It was a very, very quiet drive home...
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Fenien Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 hours 39 minutes ago at 9:25pm
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Planned an epic day livebaiting for kings off a west coast ledge,after a long trek in to chosen spot I found out that what I thought was my berley was actually a lamb leg roast.At least I had dinner sorted.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote shaneg Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 8 hours 54 minutes ago at 11:10pm
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Driving out driveway with boat on this arvo and it bounced off tow ball and blocked rather busy road I live on. No damage and luckily some guys in cars helped me put back on and get underway. Obviously wasn’t completely on ball when I put on the drive way… was on funny angle which made hard to tilt jockey wheel up. Reminder to myself to always check in future.
Remember years ago same thing  happening and tow ball smashed into back windscreen of mate’s new station wagon,  shattering it completely. I wasn’t to blame that day, as mate had attached it securely, or not as case was. That time didn’t even get out of the driveway.
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