What are your epic fails?

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    Posted: 21 Jun 2022 at 5:41pm
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You know the ones. You promise the world & no fish. I have soooo many but then you probably know that Big smile. Luckily I have to go visit the in laws but I'll post up some of mine when I get back (2000 word limit Smudge).
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Tzer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 Jun 2022 at 8:58pm
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Originally posted by smudge smudge wrote:

You know the ones. You promise the world & no fish. I have soooo many but then you probably know that Big smile. Luckily I have to go visit the in laws but I'll post up some of mine when I get back (2000 word limit Smudge).


I think some of us might wait until your've posted up smudge, we need sometime to try and beat.
Please keep it to fishing as we all know one of your biggest fails is being a die hard Warriors fan.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote smudge Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 Jun 2022 at 9:48pm
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Originally posted by Tzer Tzer wrote:

Originally posted by smudge smudge wrote:

You know the ones. You promise the world & no fish. I have soooo many but then you probably know that Big smile. Luckily I have to go visit the in laws but I'll post up some of mine when I get back (2000 word limit Smudge).


I think some of us might wait until your've posted up smudge, we need sometime to try and beat.
Please keep it to fishing as we all know one of your biggest fails is being a die hard Warriors fan.

Being a Warriors fan is a strength as you will find out next year Tzer Big smile

OK, probably my favourite was when I caught one of if not the biggest gurnard I've caught and I was holding it and dancing around while singing 'who is the gurnard king' when with a flick of its tail it jumped out of my hands, landed in the water and swam away

On one of our Grunter Hunter comps we didn't have a single gurnard on board, first and only time. Toward the end of the day I hooked a biggie and went to lift it into the boat rather than use a net. Guesswhat? No gurnard came aboard that day

Up until about 5 or 6 years ago I used to fish at winter off a local boat ramp at night using fly, softbaits and lures for kahawai on light tackle. It was a pretty sure thing, some nights 20 big kahawai, mostly between 2 and say eight fish. I remember three times I took a few well known forum members at the time (Boulder, Tobes I recall) and got skunked.

Don't even start on gamefishing stories 
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Alan L Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Jun 2022 at 8:03am
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I once shot off all prepared for an epic fish at spot X. Arrived to find I had no rods on board. Still in the garage.
Duuh.
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I wouldn't describe not catching fish a fail, it is fishing after all, not catching! Injury or equipment damage/loss is a fail. Something comes to mind though. I was having a spectacular season trout fishing on Kai Iwi Lakes landing multiple 4lb plus fish every visit. One day, I took the family and trailered the "boat" all the way over there. I tried jigging, trolling, casting spinners , fly fishing and even bait fishing (legal) and not a single bite!
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote Dagwood Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Jun 2022 at 10:15am
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Embarrassing to write but it might help others avoid making the same sort of mistakes and not being so lucky...

Mate and I borrowed another mates boat probably around 20 years ago now. We took one of my relatives and a neighbour out for a tiki tour and to clear our cray pots. My relative certainly couldn't swim and both he and the neighbour were elderly.

Mistake / lesson 1 - I didn't insist they wear life jackets. (Now everyone on board a boat I'm skippering wears PFDs)

We arrived at a highlight we planned to visit to find a big swell running through a narrow gut we needed to get through to get to it. I was on the helm and my reaction was it's too rough and deemed it a no go. My mate was always a bit "she'll be right" coupled with a very dominant personality and pushed to do it. 

I conceded and we made it in ok. On the way out a big swell stood up and broke over the foredeck, up the wind screen and into the boat. We weren't swamped but pretty frightening for the "visitors" and we got pushed into the sides of the gut leaving a quite a ding in the upper hull / gunwale area. 

Mistake / lesson 2 - If I'm not 100% happy or someone on board isn't happy with something and we can avoid it, we don't do it. Peer pressure to take a risk is quickly recognised and dealt with.

We got out ok and home in one piece and at the end of the day just an exciting story to tell. However that ding reminded me for years of the event and how close we came to a very different and potentially tragic result that would have been totally unimaginable to live with. My approach to safety changed forever...


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I'm a flyfishing tragic - I'm almost too embarrassed to put this one up......


There was the time I was whipping some loops onto the flyline and working with superglue.
Fiddly little job to just add literally a spot to lines - opened tube with teeth to keep both hands free......yep......job done and go to put the glue back into cap still in my mouth....miss completely and end up squirting superglue onto my lips that join.

Wild panic........ripped lips......blood everywhere.

NO!
No pictures.

Dead

EDIT - I was going to keep my lips sealed on this one but it was too good to not share LOLLOL


Oh..... then there's the time -

Just finished tying up a bunch of fiddly little dry flies and doing a bit of a tidy up with the vacuum cleaner to get rid of the bits of hairs and feather off cuts on the bench.

At any rate, put the little dries to the side and get the nozzle in close to the bench corner and next thing WHOOSH 12 flies become 5.

:eek::eek:- F&$#@%^$%Censored


No way I was going to rip that vacuum bag open to go looking for them.

Back to the vice.

"Only when the last tree has died, the last river has been poisoned and the last fish has been caught,will we realize that we cannot eat money" - 19th Century Indian Creed
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Phantom Menace Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Jun 2022 at 12:32pm
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Back when I was doing more SCUBA diving (and was a poor student) one epic fail involved a bit of hubris and some peer pressure.

We were on a dive club trip to Matauri Bay and one of the goals was to get people out to see the Rainbow Warrior.  It was before there was a permanent buoy on the wreck (some of the locals objected to it and had cut it off a couple of times) so to dive the wreck you had to know what to transits to line up to drop the anchor in the right place.  The last time I had dived it I had got it bang on and dropped the anchor on the foredeck so I was pretty confident I could find it again.

We were using a little 14ft tinnie (cheap ass students) so could only take a small group out at a time.  One group went out while the rest of us stayed to put tents up.  This first group did not find the wreck and I made a smart alec comment or two to them 😊 when they came back to the beach.  It was getting a little late in the day but I agreed to take a second group out to dive it.

When we got out to the RW I lined up the transits and quickly dropped the anchor over – I recall thinking that the anchor chain was a bit shorter than last time I had used this boat!  We did not have space for a boatman so we all got in the water and swam down to find we were not quite in the right place but I knew which direction it “should” be in so I got the group to follow me and we very quickly swam up to the RW and had a good dive exploring it.

Once the dive was done we surfaced to find … no boat in sight!  

The Warrior is sitting on sand and the anchor had dragged.  The wind was blowing towards the Cavallis and the swell had picked up a bit so we started to swim that direction.  (If we had lost the boat completely we would have made it to the Cavs so would at least have been on an island by late in the evening.) 

After some time when I was at the top of a swell and the boat was at the top of a swell I saw it in the distance (a big relief).  We were slowly catching the boat but the sun was close to setting – I contemplated leaving my tank and BCD with the group and powering off to catch the boat but we decided to stick together.  We managed to catch up to the boat and climb in.  By the time we got back to Matauri Bay the sun had set – the group onshore had parked a car with headlights on to help us find our way back.  

Lessons include:
Don’t let hubris and “I can do this” drive you to do shyte
Allow more contingency in your timeframes
Have a proper amount of chain on your anchor! (especially if no boatman)
Etc.

Here is what the Rainbow Warrior looked like about 7 years ago when I took some French folk out to freedive it.  (Back at the time of the story above you could still see the rainbow and dove painted on the side).


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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote smudge Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Jun 2022 at 2:30pm
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Some great stories guys, some very sobering ones too.

Re Kai Iwi lakes MB. We stayed there a week on our first ever time there and for the first time we went trout fishing. First cast my Father in Law hooked a small trout and dropped it as he lifted it out of the water. I fished at least 2 hours every morning and afternoon for a week. Not a fish. We were using spinners. Went back the next year with and caught heaps.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote wayno Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Jun 2022 at 7:52pm
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Hmmm .....

1. Awesome weather forecast on my day off, boat ready, all the rods plus a few extra just in case, and down to the ramp.
Launched boat, parked up and walked back to head off and... No key in the boat ignition. Still on the hook back at home.
Lucky on wasn't a busy day and I live about 5 mins from the ramp.
Rushed home towing empty trailer to collect key and back to ramp where the boat was waiting for me.
Ended up catching a bunch of fish so all good in the end.

2. 25-ish miles offshore with a mate fishing the deep. No luck on hapuka or bluenose but we got onto a nice patch of terakihi with the odd baby shark in the mix...
Attempting to de-hook a shark from the bottom hook of a 3 hook rig when the bugger bit through the trace leaving 2 free hooks to drop on the 32oz sinker, one of them collected my finger through the nail and the point exited the nail as well.
Thanks A&E for getting the hook out.

3. New Years day about 3 years ago out solo hunting skippies, managed a few so wrapped the lures and went for a bottom fish.
Unseen by me one of the lures bounced out of the side shelf onto the floor and one half of the double hook went right into my foot when I went to grab a rod with a fish on.
Thanks A&E for getting the hook out - again!
Pretty sure that was the last day I ever went barefoot on the boat!

And yes, I do have photos of both hook in flesh occasions ££

To be old and wise you must first be young and stupid.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Pcj Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Jun 2022 at 8:17pm
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Fishing solo bring up the anchor,jams on shackle and push winch button in goes hand,middlemore stitches. 

Catch a hammerhead and realise anchor warp in teeth and bye bye anchor.

v13 first day out thinking self drain cockpit pit,wrong back on trailer drain ,bung in.

Too many fails to list
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote Turnright Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Jun 2022 at 8:29pm
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Bout 130 am get a call from my uncle who was out fishing bowentown harbour in 25-35knt winds and horizontal rain, boat won't go can you come rescue me, yip okon our way, after a long cold tow in the rain get to the ramp and in some decent light look over side of boat and ask why the landyard not in its home................he owed a few beers for that one!!!!
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Took the little inflatable to launch of Papamoa Beach, off the trailer, float in shallow water, about to start up. Oops no fuel tank.
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I thought I had been mostly fail free but then I remembered.  Circa 1983 - after a day's fishing off Dampier in the NW of WA I was towing my 6.3m Caribbean Reef Runner boat back to Karratha, a trip of some 16kms.  No safety chains attached as others thought they needed my shackles more than I did.  Going over the bridge which spans the railway line the trailer detaches itself from the tow ball and is now completely free.  My saving grace was that we were not travelling at speed.  The trailer nose-dived into the bitumen and tracked reasonably straight after side swiping the bridge and grinding to a halt.  Damage was limited to a 300mm long gouge to the gelcoat on the side of the boat.  It could have been soooo much worse.  The trailer wasn't seated properly on the tow ball in the first place but that's another story.     
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote e.m.p! Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Jun 2022 at 7:59am
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we went for a dive and 6 miles out we noticed I forgot my fins in the car. Didn't want to ride all the way back, so we decided to share my divebuddie's pair. I had one of his fins on my right foot and he had the other on his left, so at the descent I spiralled counterclockwise and he went down like a cork screw in the other direction...
(naa, just pulling your leg, haha)
But seriously, it worked surprisingly well and we got home with a handful of bugs, some decent fish and a funny yarn to tell.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Alan L Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Jun 2022 at 8:53am
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Forgetting the key (Wayno), I towed my boat from Hawkes Bay to Waikaremoana - to find I had no key. I always leave it in the boat. Then I got security conscious and thought I should take it out. Dumb mistake.
I asked the camp caretakerif by chance he had a key for my boat. Not expecting anything (what else to do?) he came with a box of keys - people had lost/left behind. After sifting thru his box I found one that had the right blank and with some jiggling it worked - sometimes.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote Phantom Menace Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Jun 2022 at 9:29am
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Originally posted by Turnright Turnright wrote:

Bout 130 am get a call from my uncle who was out fishing bowentown harbour in 25-35knt winds and horizontal rain, boat won't go can you come rescue me, yip okon our way, after a long cold tow in the rain get to the ramp and in some decent light look over side of boat and ask why the landyard not in its home................he owed a few beers for that one!!!!

You aren't he only one that has happened to.  When we are out with Coastguard and we get tasked to a a boat with electrical issues we always get them to check that it's in neutral and the lanyard in the right place before we hook up and tow them.

Also - after I had agreed the price and the new owner had paid the deposit for my old boat the weather was too nice so we went out for one last jaunt in the old girl.  Some friends were going to Sullivans Bay (Mahurangi) on the same day so I was drifting round just off the beach trying to ring them.  When I went to restart the motor it was completely dead!  Dropped the anchor and started playing with the battery connections (I had put a new battery in not long ago) and sat there cursing.

Light bulb came on - it was NOT in neutral. It fired up straight away as soon as I put it in neutral.

****

And another (the no fin story reminded me of this one).  My nephew wanted to come out for a little spearfish and my sister and the rest of her family wanted to go to the beach so I got the nephew to come to my place (near Eden Park at that time) early and we went to Omaha to launch and had arranged to meet my sister at Tawharanui for lunch. Everything was going well until I went to get in the water and realised I had left my weight belt at home!  Usually I have a few spare bits and pieces in the boat but I had cleaned it out the weekend before so there was NOTHING.  I rang my sister to see if she could bring something up but she was well on her way by then.

I found a few smoothish rocks and wedged them in my wetsuit and they helped a little - we managed to get the nephew onto a couple of butterfish so it wasn't all bad.

ON the no fins front - a friend had a goal of pole spearing a kingfish with no fins.  He achieved it!  (It took him a fair amoutn of time to get it right).
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Years ago me and a mate were off to the first furuno fishing contest at kawau island. Had the boat all loaded up for the weekend, bait, beer and a few bottles of rum, this was before RTDs.

I was a smoker then so I had a new carton of cigarettes for the weekend, stuffed down the front of my swandry so they wouldn’t get wet while we were loading up the boat down at gulf harbour boat ramp, this was before the rock Seawall.

Blowing a southerly so I trying to hold the boat while my mate started the motor so I could just jump and we were gone.

Big swell set came in and picked up the boat and dumped it on the rocks next to the ramp, smashing one of the blades of the prop. I ended up in the water with my new f—king carton of cigarettes floating away in the waves.

So nothing else to do but put the boat back on the trailer and go deal to the rum at my mates place.

I was that pissed about my cigarettes I gave up smoking though.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote smudge Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Jun 2022 at 9:12pm
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Originally posted by Kandrew Kandrew wrote:

Years ago me and a mate were off to the first furuno fishing contest at kawau island. Had the boat all loaded up for the weekend, bait, beer and a few bottles of rum, this was before RTDs.

I was a smoker then so I had a new carton of cigarettes for the weekend, stuffed down the front of my swandry so they wouldn’t get wet while we were loading up the boat down at gulf harbour boat ramp, this was before the rock Seawall.

Blowing a southerly so I trying to hold the boat while my mate started the motor so I could just jump and we were gone.

Big swell set came in and picked up the boat and dumped it on the rocks next to the ramp, smashing one of the blades of the prop. I ended up in the water with my new f—king carton of cigarettes floating away in the waves.

So nothing else to do but put the boat back on the trailer and go deal to the rum at my mates place.

I was that pissed about my cigarettes I gave up smoking though.

Classic, I'll post up a ciggie story soon
Best gurnard fisherman in my street
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