Yeah ok Smudge, fire away.
Translation: Fine, I've run out of boyfriends to call tonight anyway. Smudge, you have a photo of yourself? What are you wearing?
Fantastic Stu, this wont hurt a bit
First up when did you first get interested in fishing?
My dad got me into fishing when I was a nipper. Kinda been getting stuck into it since then.
Translation: My Dad thought he might be able to divert my rampant gayness to some blokely pastime.
You haven’t been on the site all that long but you’ve certainly made your mark, something like 18 posts in the first couple of days. How, did you discover fishing.net?
Most likely I was searching the net for something fishy and it popped up.
Translation: I Googled "Notorious NZ Gay Men" and it went straight to Bushpig's profile on Fishing.net
What other fishing websites do you visit?
Is this a trick question? Are the fun police watching me again? Na , mudhole.com, swell map, Bloody decks, and the ITM fishing show page.
Translation: I've heard of the other sites but mudhole.com is my Homepage.
Name the last 5 web addresses in your History thingy and explain them please!
I'd have to kill you if I told you the last five. Lets just say there is one or two that you wouldn't show your kids. (Thanks for the pm there Stu )
Translation: Send your kids down here and I'll show them.
So ummm, why the name biggear? Are you an enormous wingnut or what?
Funny you should ask. I got stuck with it due to work. We sell fruit and veges and specialise in off size, large fruit...............so it went. Hey you got any Big Gear??? and so on and so on.
Translation: My childhood sweetheart had the nickname "Noddy". He never said "No". We hung out so much, the rest of the borstal boys started calling me Big Ears.
Someone tells me you have a fascination with rats and mice, what’s that about?
The ******* have been living in my shed over winter, and eating anything in their path. Im having great pleasure in trapping them and feeding them to my dogs.
Translation: The ******* have been living in my shed over winter, and eating anything in their path. Im having great pleasure in using up all my masking tape.
I started a thread a little while ago ‘dirty little secrets’ where we could unload some dark stuff from our past, tell us something really, really silly you’ve done!
I once volunteered to test a flying fox we built in scouts. I guess the 7 broken ribs and ruptured kidneys were not worth the fame.
Translation: I once volunteered to test a flying fox I built in scouts. I guess I'm not a very good builder.
You pop up regularly in the ‘What I bought today’ thread. How long did it take for that raging TAS infection to really take hold? Is it true you have a gimble bolted onto your office chair?
Na the gimbal on office chair is a myth, however Topcatch do have me on their speed dial. TAS is an infectious disease as we all know, and much like swine flu, if you spend any time with others affected by the disease you too will come down with it. Perhaps I caught it from Boulder.
Translation: The dispenser on the wall of the boat cabin is NOT a myth.
What other interests do you have outside of fishing?
I still play a bit of ruggers. I play the guitar a bit. I love to dive as well. Then theres work (self employed) and three kids to keep me entertained as well. When I can I knock the odd deer over as well.
Translation: I bought three kids to make myself look normal. They brought their mother with them.
(I wouldn't mind knocking the odd dear over either biggie but I'm married).
You well and truly made your mark here with that great act of good buggerliness in kicking off the mission to get Adam Te Atatu sorted with a new motor, that was a great effort and I’d like to thank you on behalf of the fishing.net team for such a good deed. Well done.
It was my pleasure.
Translation: Doing the groundwork for some pleasure.
<Adam - BEWARE!>
If I ask nicely can you get me a shiny new Merc too?
Ask and you shall receive.
Na bugger off, ask Bushie to borrow his motor, its redundant most of the time.
Translation: I do know facts about fellow f.net members and their fishing habits (or lack thereof).
What’s your idea of a dream fishing adventure?
Geez so many options. It would have to be me and a few mates catching a marlin on my own boat. Thats one cherry still not popped. Mind you the kings trip I just went on was pretty bloody special as well.
Translation: A week of game fishing with Michael Barrymore.
A few quickfire questions now:
Guilty or not guilty? Are we talking about me eating all the pies or David Bain? Guilty to both.
Translation: Thank God you don't know the right questions Smudge.
League / rugby / soccer? League.
Translation: Men's synchronized swimming.
Country or western? Spoilt for choice here. Country
Translation: Southern states revival blues. I really like Duelling Banjos.
Beer, rum, wine or oj? Beer.
Translation: Whatever Beagle is supplying.
Toast, cornies or bacon & eggs? Bacon and eggs is a staple. Just dont let the Beagle cook your eggs.
Translation: I'll give you the tip: Hard eggs = Big Marlin.
Bait, plastics or jigs? Im loving my jigging at the moment, but you cant beat the smell of half a skippie head being biffed over the side in the hope of a big Moocher.
Translation: I've been jigging since puberty.
Shortland St, Campbell Live or Flight of the Conchords? Flight of the Conchords.......Its business time.
Translation: Gok's Fashion Show.
Snapper, kingies, marlin or couttas? Kingis. Pound for pound they are a great fighting fish.
Translation: I've never caught a marlin.
What would be your ultimate fishing trip? Are you trying to trick me. I'm not drunk today. Ultimate lady, whanganella banks, jigging a marlin.
Translation: Ultimate Lady, anywhere, Michael Barrymore.
Have you ever been really, really drunk and done something really, really silly? I like asking this question because I’ve never been in that situation.
Of course, usually once a week. Like last thursday night I ............... I will leave it up to your imagination but 6 bottles of sake, 6 pints of monteiths gold and god knows how many snakebites dont make for a good combination.
Translation: I agreed to this interview. I knew there would be translations. How stoopid am I?
Crusty Demons, the Three Tenors or Showgirls?
Is there more than one answer to this question. I once took my father in law to showgirls. It was nice. Especially since he shouted all the dollars.
Translation: I date my father in law.
Who is the most influential fisherman you’ve met & why?
My dad. Because he got me into it and imparted the love of the sea which I will pass onto my children. Also Boulder cause he is a ho.
Translation: All those hours Dad trolled me as a livie for Makos paid off.
Brace yourself biggear, I’ve saved this one til last and it’s a toughie, you’ll need to dig deep and be brave. If you could keep only one of your rigs what would it be and why?
Mate................It would have to be my JM powerspell 400 and OJ4000. Purely because I love jigging. But to be honest, if all I had was a green cotton handline and some rusty hooks, I would be just as happy. As long as you are out there doing it, anything will suffice.
Translation: My KY dispenser.
Thanks for that biggear, you interview well. I'll now hand you over to the wolves!!