Yes members in a rash bacon making moment the pork pie specialist from Kaiwaka has sent me a list of Smudge like questions which I have agreed to answer only because he insisted he would answer them himself on my behalf if I refused then type his own translations below.

Sad really amd more the actions of a master "owner operator" than a sane man but he is as stated himself " The ultimate mongrel in a pound of virtual MUTTS"

The Boulder Bash

1. Is it true that you have more rods and reels than Smart Marine and W S Lauries put together?

A1   This is not true at all I have a few (37 rods and 42 reels) all in current use, this includes the ones on long term borrows from well meaning friends. Many of these rods were purchased from those fine establishments above but of late a respectable number have arrived after a flutter on trade me

2. How did you first get interested in fishing and did they have rods and reels in the Stone Age?

A2   Unlike you Bacon Maker I led a well rounded and happy childhood being introduced to fishing at an early age both for trout at Lake Toupo and Whakamaru then spending every Christmas holidays for three weeks at Schoolhouse Bay near Te Kaha after Snapper, Hapuka and Tuna. We started with a Plylite 12ft6� driven by a mighty 4.5hp clutch model Seagull outboard and progressed though several boats to a Hanes hunter V196 with a Volvo petrol inboard and sternleg.

3. It is widely believed that your name Boulder comes from the fact you were actually born in the Stone Age. Is there any truth to that?

A3   Not so but unlike yourself I was born in an age where real men were expected to have real stones and I was fortunate to be so gifted. My Name comes from a sailing mate who looked at me one day and said �No one gets that fat from eating you must have swallowed a boulder� and I have been known as the boulder ever since. Though I recently implied to a lady I was talking to that the name described my matrimonial tackle size.

4. What do you rate as your greatest fishing accomplishment?

A4 This is an easy one and that is consistently out fishing you on your own boat. But some of the trips away to the Ranfurly stand out in my memory.

5. Over the next 5 year what are your fishing goals?

A5  I still have a list of places to go and some places to go back to as they owe me a fish or two. Especially the three kings and the Mokau trench as well as the Rumbles 60 miles out from White Island. The Mokauhinaus owe me a good fish and I want to spend a night or two in Whangamumu. Then I might think about Western Australia and Sailfish. The ten year plan involves most of the South Pacific and somewhere in there is a bash at those Tuna off Greymouth.

6. Apart from Bushpig. Who is your greatest fishing mentor and why?

A6  I acknowledge your input Bushpig as during my growth it has been comforting to measure myself against a truly average person to get a better handle on my progress. Sometimes though the handles in your case have been somewhat difficult to find for some very well known reasons! Seroiusly I have totally enjoyed learning from Kezza and PDS and many others while still looking forward to a day out with Lethal and my trip to Vanuatu with Matt and Kezza

7. Of the 300 or so rods and reels you own, what is your favourite bit of kit?

A7 That�s a hard one to answer as it has been said I am buggered for choice somewhat. Having started snapper fishing with a green handline and progressing after many years to 100lb Nylon handline it is a special treat to be able to choose the perfect bit of kit for a planned days fishing. I do favour my 8/10kg Catchalot with my TLD10 but if casting is involved I revert to my trusty Diawa sl30. For game fishing the Diawa 80wide that PDS got a fish on is a serious contender to make my day happiness filled.

8. Some forum Members rate you as a great guy. How much did you pay them to spread this news? , Or is it simply that your good at PR from your corporate environment?

A8    Quality and truth will always bubble to the top and you will be recognised for the wonderful sharing caring person you are. I am sure you will have found this equally true Bushie then again on second thoughts perhaps this is not yet in your stock of experiences. The only way to have good friends is first to be a good friend and if that means going the extra yards for a mate there is no question that�s what I will do.

9. How much are you willing to pay me to publish your replies with out editing them? What are your ban account numbers and is there any truth to the rumour that you and Billfish are brothers and you both appear to have been beaten by the same ugly stick?

A9     The answer to the first part is not one brass razoo and I have gone to extraordinary lengths to post this myself and avoid the tampering of trusty trotters.

It is true in part that Billfish and I are soul brothers both demonstrating all that�s best and manly in this modern world. As to our finely chiselled features a quick trip to a surgeon could if we so desired fix this. Others will never afford the psychiatric help that would be necessary to lighten their dark twisted souls

10. Its been said your involvement in this site and the people you have met through it have changed you, maybe even made you a better fisherman. How do you rate the impact of the people you�ve met through the site.

A10    At last a positive question as the many people I have met and come to admire and respect as friends have had a huge impact on me as a person. A better fisherman is also partly true as I have been exposed to many different styles and methods all of which has fuelled the demand for new and job specific tackle. This has caused some dissention on the home front but a clever use of spousal disinformation and plain cunning and deceit has overcome most of that. A months trip to Italy and much Gold jewellery has mopped up any residue of ill temper. Three years ago before F.Net I did not own a single gold reel whereas today�s tally stands at 4. I had never had the slightest interest in Game fishing till last year as I could never see the point in catching something you were going to let go and not eat.

11. Is it true that even if you catch your first marlin in Vanuatu with The ITM Fishing Show boys, you will still be a "virgin" as fish outside NZs waters DON'T count for squat?

A11    When I get back I am sure everyone who see�s my smile will know that I am no longer a Marlin �virgin� and as I intend to catch at least one more than your seasons tally Bushpig. My smile will be wider than the one on the town bike (an old expression for a verrry friendly girl) The only squatting to be done will be on your part as you hang your head so low in shame at being trashed yet again by a man old enough to be your father. Hold on a mo where did you say your mother lived, nonO NOOOOOOOOO that�s just too scary a thought to contemplate.

Conclusion   I have enjoyed meeting all the members I have come in contact with and consider those that I have missed as friends I just have not met yet

Boulder AKA Be older AKA Koru

Chortle, chortle. First rate guys.

Chris

Im glad you liked question 10 Boulder, its one of the gems that Bushy went to others for help with.......

"Seroiusly I have totally enjoyed learning from Kezza and PDS and many others"

Fark ME, I hate to think what these guys taught ya....lol.

Good report..guys....now waiting

Cheers Wefaknis

hahahah, nice guys.......... Keep it up...... Hope the marlin cherry gets broken in the tropics

I still have a list of places to go and some places to go back to as they owe me a fish or two. Especially the three kings and the Mokau trench as well as the Rumbles 60 miles out from White Island.

Hold the phone Boulder... before the end of this winter The Trench will happen... and we will NOT be Beagled !

Enjoyed the interview and must look back through a few in this forum when I get the chance.

Quote: Originally posted by The Beagle on 10 April 2006

---

Hold the phone Boulder... before the end of this winter The Trench will happen... and we will NOT be Beagled !

---

Beagle:

You planning a trip to the trench?? I have had 2 canned, so would be keen to join you.

Keith, if I do one in the next couple of weeks it'll be during the Dinsdale Pub tournament and I already have a full crew at this stage. However, the likelihood of it all coming together (sea-state wise and making sure there's another boat out there) at this time of the year has about as much chance as me actually catching something (according to other Net members).

Still, that's two weeks away and Dutchy's boat should be back in the water this week so you never know.

But I'll definitely put you on my list of Trench starters.

The Boulder Bash

1. Is it true that you have more rods and reels than Smart Marine and W S Lauries put together?

A1   This is not true at all I have a few (37 rods and 42 reels) all in current use, this includes the ones on long term borrows from well meaning friends. Many of these rods were purchased from those fine establishments above but of late a respectable number have arrived after a flutter on trade me

Translation: I have decided to start the Be Older Home for retired, not yet retired and not yet even got wet fishing tackle. It is my divine calling to start this retirement home for tackle and I will therefore need a sizeable amount � what�s known as a critical mass in various other endeavours � to kick things off. My wife is also doing a bit of kicking lately but more on that in a minute.

2. How did you first get interested in fishing and did they have rods and reels in the Stone Age?

A2   Unlike you Bacon Maker I led a well rounded and happy childhood being introduced to fishing at an early age both for trout at Lake Toupo and Whakamaru then spending every Christmas holidays for three weeks at Schoolhouse Bay near Te Kaha after Snapper, Hapuka and Tuna. We started with a Plylite 12ft6� driven by a mighty 4.5hp clutch model Seagull outboard and progressed though several boats to a Hanes hunter V196 with a Volvo petrol inboard and sternleg.

Translation: My parents encouraged me to spend as much time playing around water as I could. It�s funny, that when we were at home they would encourage me to go out and play on the highway. I sometimes think they might not have liked me. Hahaa hahaha that�s funny, imagine parents not liking their children. Silly�. Ha ha ha

3. It is widely believed that your name Boulder comes from the fact you were actually born in the Stone Age. Is there any truth to that?

A3   Not so but unlike yourself I was born in an age where real men were expected to have real stones and I was fortunate to be so gifted. My Name comes from a sailing mate who looked at me one day and said �No one gets that fat from eating you must have swallowed a boulder� and I have been known as the boulder ever since. Though I recently implied to a lady I was talking to that the name described my matrimonial tackle size.

Translation: I made it up myself. Other men buy Ferarris but when I got down to Giltrap European, my well � known personality trait, which has been likened to a snapper�s bum, kicked in. So I made up the name � I can use it to suggest I am well endowed and it was much cheaper than a Porsche.

4. What do you rate as your greatest fishing accomplishment?

A4 This is an easy one and that is consistently out fishing you on your own boat. But some of the trips away to the Ranfurly stand out in my memory.

Translation: Contrary to popular belief, I did catch a fish once. I think it was a jernard. Had these funny wings out the sides and grunted.

5. Over the next 5 year what are your fishing goals?

A5  I still have a list of places to go and some places to go back to as they owe me a fish or two. Especially the three kings and the Mokau trench as well as the Rumbles 60 miles out from White Island. The Mokauhinaus owe me a good fish and I want to spend a night or two in Whangamumu. Then I might think about Western Australia and Sailfish. The ten year plan involves most of the South Pacific and somewhere in there is a bash at those Tuna off Greymouth.

Translation: Catch another jernard without it costing me too much money.

6. Apart from Bushpig. Who is your greatest fishing mentor and why?

A6  I acknowledge your input Bushpig as during my growth it has been comforting to measure myself against a truly average person to get a better handle on my progress. Sometimes though the handles in your case have been somewhat difficult to find for some very well known reasons! Seroiusly I have totally enjoyed learning from Kezza and PDS and many others while still looking forward to a day out with Lethal and my trip to Vanuatu with Matt and Kezza

Translation: I have answered this question in this way for two reasons. One, they are both much bigger than me and capable of reducing me to a pile of rubble. Two, I have my eye on a couple of Kezza�s rods and reels for my retirement home and I have to be nice to him. What I really think is that he is a bad man and should be locked away. But you can edit that bit out can�t you?

7. Of the 300 or so rods and reels you own, what is your favourite bit of kit?

A7 That�s a hard one to answer as it has been said I am buggered for choice somewhat. Having started snapper fishing with a green handline and progressing after many years to 100lb Nylon handline it is a special treat to be able to choose the perfect bit of kit for a planned days fishing. I do favour my 8/10kg Catchalot with my TLD10 but if casting is involved I revert to my trusty Diawa sl30. For game fishing the Diawa 80wide that PDS got a fish on is a serious contender to make my day happiness filled.

Translation: Well I nicknamed it Boulder didn�t I. That should give you a clue. There will be plenty of space for old rods in my retirement home.

8. Some forum Members rate you as a great guy. How much did you pay them to spread this news? , Or is it simply that your good at PR from your corporate environment?

A8    Quality and truth will always bubble to the top and you will be recognised for the wonderful sharing caring person you are. I am sure you will have found this equally true Bushie then again on second thoughts perhaps this is not yet in your stock of experiences. The only way to have good friends is first to be a good friend and if that means going the extra yards for a mate there is no question that�s what I will do.

((Translator was sick at this point))

9. How much are you willing to pay me to publish your replies with out editing them? What are your bank account numbers and is there any truth to the rumour that you and Billfish are brothers and you both appear to have been beaten by the same ugly stick?

A9     The answer to the first part is not one brass razoo and I have gone to extraordinary lengths to post this myself and avoid the tampering of trusty trotters.

It is true in part that Billfish and I are soul brothers both demonstrating all that�s best and manly in this modern world. As to our finely chiselled features a quick trip to a surgeon could if we so desired fix this. Others will never afford the psychiatric help that would be necessary to lighten their dark twisted souls

Translation: (Remember the �not one brass razoo� quote, fellow readers for sometimes, a person will reveal their innermost selves at the most unusual of times).

10. Its been said your involvement in this site and the people you have met through it have changed you, maybe even made you a better fisherman. How do you rate the impact of the people you�ve met through the site.

A10    At last a positive question as the many people I have met and come to admire and respect as friends have had a huge impact on me as a person. A better fisherman is also partly true as I have been exposed to many different styles and methods all of which has fuelled the demand for new and job specific tackle. This has caused some dissention on the home front but a clever use of spousal disinformation and plain cunning and deceit has overcome most of that. A months trip to Italy and much Gold jewellery has mopped up any residue of ill temper. Three years ago before F.Net I did not own a single gold reel whereas today�s tally stands at 4. I had never had the slightest interest in Game fishing till last year as I could never see the point in catching something you were going to let go and not eat.

Translation: I am a hopeless tackle addict. One of the worst since they locked Shimma Jim away in the Wellington Home for Tackle Addicts. Pretending to be nice to some of the layabouts, drunkards and thieves who inhabit this site gives me the perfect excuse to blame my failings on others when my wife catches on. Some of you fullahs sure make good excuses.

11. Is it true that even if you catch your first marlin in <st1:country-region w:st="on">Vanuatu</st1:country-region> with The ITM Fishing Show boys, you will still be a "virgin" as fish outside NZs waters DON'T count for squat?

A11    When I get back I am sure everyone who see�s my smile will know that I am no longer a Marlin �virgin� and as I intend to catch at least one more than your seasons tally Bushpig. My smile will be wider than the one on the town bike (an old expression for a verrry friendly girl) The only squatting to be done will be on your part as you hang your head so low in shame at being trashed yet again by a man old enough to be your father. Hold on a mo where did you say your mother lived, nonO NOOOOOOOOO that�s just too scary a thought to contemplate.

Translation: Given the likelihood of me catching a marlin, that virginity of mine is about as safe as that dollar note that�s been at the bottom of your pocket for the last 17 years Bushpig.

Conclusion   I have enjoyed meeting all the members I have come in contact with and consider those that I have missed as friends I just have not met yet

Translation: I haven�t finished buying tackle yet so if a few more of you want to be my excuses, I mean, friends, you are welcome.

Boulder AKA Be older AKA Koru

Droll Bender and I have seen you do much better but as a word smith extroardinaire recently wrote for me -:

That man shall endure

the righteous torture

of our fearless Inquisitor�s bludgeon

So the truth be laid bare 

to the blistering glare

of this august forum's Smudgeon

This kind of sums it up and thank you Billfish Nice to know a man has some mates left in this world!

" ... but as a word smith extroardinaire recently wrote ... "

Kewl, poetry opportunity!

There once was a fisherman called Boulder
Who at Houhora made me considerably older
'cos I found the taste in my breakfast
while he found his in the cook's ass
And when we left he did cry on my shoulder

Okay, so I'm no poet, so what.

Big old Boiiing from me.........

It aint that easy B older

1. Is it true that you have more rods and reels than Smart Marine and W S Lauries put together?