Fishing Humour

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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote bazza Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Jan 2022 at 8:08pm
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Joined: 12 Dec 2006
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When council swimming pools re open, due to social distancing rules there will be no water in lanes 1, 3 & 5 !
When you cry, feel pain or sadness, no one notices your sorrow .... BUT
fart just ONE time !!!!!!!!!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote bazza Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 Jan 2022 at 5:08pm
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OBE - Over Bloody Eighty

Joined: 12 Dec 2006
Location: Mostlyinthepoo
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Points: 17915
Two women on a bus were having a bitter argument as to which one of them was entitled to occupy the only remaining vacant seat.

The conductor unsuccessfully tried to intervene so finally declared ...
"We will leave it to the driver to decide"

The driver answered simply "Let the ugly one have the seat !"

Problem solved in an instant & the seat remained unoccupied for the rest of the journey.
When you cry, feel pain or sadness, no one notices your sorrow .... BUT
fart just ONE time !!!!!!!!!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote Pcj Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 Jan 2022 at 5:20am
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Amateur's built the ark. Professional built the Titanic
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We were all at a fishing trip, no one wanted to room with Bob, because he snored so badly. We decided it wasn't fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time, so we voted to take turns.
The first guy slept with Bob and comes to breakfast the next morning with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot.
We said, "Man, what happened to you? He said, "Bob snored so loudly, I just sat up and watched him all night."
The next night it was a different guy's turn. In the morning, same thing, hair all standing up, eyes all bloodshot.
We said, "Man, what happened to you? You look awful! He said, 'Man, that Bob shakes the roof with his snoring. I watched him all night."
The third night was Fred's turn. Fred was a tanned, older cowboy, a man's man. The next morning he came to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. "Good morning!" he said. We couldn't believe it. We said, "Man, what happened?"
He said, "Well, we got ready for bed. I went and tucked Bob into bed, patted him on the butt, and kissed him good night.. Bob sat up and watched me all night."
With age comes wisdom. 😆
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Pcj Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 Jan 2022 at 2:35pm
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After 7 boosters Bazza and I are ok.




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"Bazza" never gives up.




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Post Options Post Options   Likes (4) Likes(4)   Quote Marligator Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 Jan 2022 at 9:14am
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Excellent LOL
Cant beat hunting and Fishing in N.Z
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Top 10 finish
2024 Grunter Hunter.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (2) Likes(2)   Quote Skoti Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 Jan 2022 at 6:30pm
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COVID is no joke !
One former patient was so brain damaged after , he thought he won an election he lost by 7 million votes .
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Marligator - best of the year so far
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A farmer ordered a high-tech milking machine. Since the equipment arrived when his wife was out of town, he decided to test it on himself first. So, he inserted his 'manhood' into the equipment, turned on the switch and everything else was automatic. Soon, he realized that the equipment provided him with much more pleasure than his wife did. When the fun was over, though, he quickly realized that he couldn't remove the instrument from his 'member'. He read the manual but didn't find any useful information on how to disengage himself. He tried every button on the instrument, but still without success. Finally, he decided to call the supplier's Customer Service Hot Line with his mobile phone (Thank god for mobile phones!). 'Hello, I just bought a milking machine from your company. It works Fantastic, but how do I remove it from the cow's udder?' 'Don't worry,' replied the customer service rep, 'The machine will release automatically once it's collected two gallons.' Have a nice day.
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Post Options Post Options   Likes (0) Likes(0)   Quote Pcj Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 Feb 2022 at 3:45pm
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Two old ladies Dolly and Ruby were talking about their grandchildren.
Dolly said, "Each year I send each of my grandchildren a card with a generous check inside. I never hear from them... never receive a thank you message."
Ruby replies, "I too send my grandchildren a very generous check. I hear from them within a week after they receive it. In fact, they each pay me a personal visit."
"Wow! How come ?”remarked Dolly.
"Very simple solution... I don't sign the check!"



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Post Options Post Options   Likes (1) Likes(1)   Quote Kevin.S Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 Feb 2022 at 3:03pm
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